Dallas TNT: 2 Hour Finale of Season 3, Endgame and Brave New World

Well, we totally nailed two things in our assessment of last week (after Boxed in) — Elena found Drew’s St. Christopher medal in the possession of Nicolas and Prince Nasir was a sucker for bright red lipstick.

When we left Bobby Ewing, he was at the Mexican cartel’s compound trying to get his wife and her daughter released. Of course, Luis refused to release Emma because that would leave him with no leverage over the Rylands. Bobby put his best threatening face on to warn Luis if anything happened to Emma, it would be curtains. We’re sure Luis was terrified (not). John Ross hatched a plan to get Emma out of there, totally ignoring Uncle Bobby’s directive to stay out of it. So he was the next one to show up in Mexico with a bag over his head. Just like Bobby, John Ross was well aware of Luis’ weak spot — his rivalry with Nicolas. But in between those two events, Emma had tried to cozy up to a young Mexican cartel underling named Fernando. This brought Luis’ wrath down on her and she was apparently both sexually and physically abused.

The U.S. Marshalls showed up at the lake where Nicolas had Elena stashed and he turned himself in and spilled the cartel beans for immunity, much to Christopher’s disgust. Nicolas agreed to help them lock up cartel head El Pozolero and kept trying to get back in Elena’s good graces. This resulted in El P and Luis sharing a jail cell and plotting to kill Nicolas’ loved ones, cook them up in a stew and make him choke on the meal, but Nicolas got them both killed in the jail first. In between, Elena found that St. Christopher medal and shot Nicolas a couple of times but he just had his arm in a sling and was still wearing $5,000 suits when last seen, looking forward to reuniting with Elena in 8 or 9 months.

Pamela Barnes Ewing cemented her own deal with Prince Nasir with a roll in the hay that John Ross walked in on. Don’t these folks lock their doors? Well, there goes that happy reunion. He called her a whore. The pot calling the kettle black, as it were.

Sue Ellen and Bobby beat both John Ross and Pamela to the punch in getting back Ewing Global in the interest of peace. LOL. Not likely but it did give John Ross the opportunity to bring up his birthright and Pamela got to bring up Digger and Cliff Barnes.

John Ross wasted no time in teaming up with Judith Ryland, who was very grateful to him for saving Emma, and informing her of her son’s CIA connection. Now Judith is the new railroad commissioner, since Bobby had to resign. And what of Harris? He is the emasculated mess in this one. He struck out with Ann with his declaration of love and Judith erased the evidence of her own dealings with the cartel, replacing it with a gloating in-your-face message.

Ann got to meet Tracey MacKay who came over for some comfort from Bobby over the death of her nephew, Hunter. Sue Ellen was there when she came and got all huffy about it. Tracey was quite the catty one when meeting Ann, referring to her as Bobby’s latest wife. Bobby always refers back to what a tough gal Tracey was, saying she could take Sue Ellen, but we doubt if she could take Ann. But that’s one more brewing conflict.

The Ewing that died was Christopher (car bomb) right after Elena found out she was preggers in the convenience store bathroom. And the big secret that John Ross found out was that he has a sister. At this point we don’t even know if there will be a Season 4 so we may never find out why that makes him so happy. What makes him think the sister will like him? Nobody else does.