Shameless Recap: We Become What We … Frank!

Frank, Fiona and Debbie Gallagher were looking to turn a new page in their lives in the Season 8 premiere of “Shameless” (11/5/2017). Ian and Lip were struggling with recent breakups. Carl had to maintain his strength over the summer so he could beat on 7th graders when he gets back to military school.

You just getting home, alley cat? ~ Lip Gallagher

Fiona decided to swear off Tinder and random flings “with anonymous men chosen for their abdominal fitness.” She wants to have a relationship with emotional connections, forgetting that the last one of those she had (with Sean) was the very reason that she signed up to Tinder to begin with! However, before her next grand amour begins, Fiona has her “new” apartment building to deal with.

When she arrived at the building and let herself into an vacant apartment, a woman named Nessa wandered in and asked Fiona if she is the “new slumlord.” Nessa said she does a lot of odd jobs around the building. She wanted to know why Fiona bought the place– to add to her cushy 401K. Fiona laughed at that notion and told Nessa she is “Southside through and through” Nessa said she is really an accountant, but moved in here because she is a pilgrim. It became apparent that she is a gay pilgrim so Fiona let her know straight up that she is not gay. “Oh, cool, I’m not looking,” Nessa replied, “and you’re not my type anyway.” She likes ’em blonde and bitchy. As if on cue, Nessa’s significant other showed up. Her name is Mel and she’s very blonde and very bitchy.

At Patsy’s Pies, where Veronica is now working, Fiona contemplated charging $900 for her vacant apartment. Kevin told Fiona the most she can get is $500. V said he never knows what he’s talking about and $600 ought to do it. Fiona decided to see if she could get $850, rationalizing that she could always go lower. As it turned out, she didn’t have to. A couple showed up who were willing to pay the $850, but a grungy dude with a bike offered $900. The final bid was $1,000, to the bike dude, we assume. We can’t see him being Fiona’s next grand amour so, more likely, he’s the tenant from hell like Michael Keaton in 1990’s “Pacific Heights.” (Okay, maybe not that bad.) But do we think Fiona is going to run background and credit checks on prospective tenants who are dangling jacked up rent in front of her greedy little eyes? Nah.

What if I run over Svetlana with Kevin’s truck?

While Fiona takes on her new venture enthusiastically, Kevin and V still have their Svetlana problem. Kevin is still strutting his stuff as a male dancer at a gay strip club to make money. V is dreaming up ways to bump Svetlana off. She gets a better idea when ICE (Immigration & Customs Enforcement) raids Patsy’s Pies, but first she goes over to the Alibi — uh, Putin’s Paradise — to confront her former wife. Svetlana is willing to go back to being a throuple as long as she is in charge because, she says, Kevin and V are stupid and need to be taken care of like babies. Svetlana issued an ultimatum: “You want to go back to old way, fine. Otherwise, get your chorny ass out of my bar.” V decked her and it was on. Regulars, Tommy and Kermit decided not to stop them unless their clothes started coming off. Later, V found the head ICE agent raiding another location and told him she had a load of illegals for him to round up. He wasn’t interested when he found out they were Russians, but when V said these illegals were involved in human trafficking and prostitution, he got right on it and the next time we saw Svetlana, she was in cuffs, being escorted into a paddy wagon.

The most American thing is the pursuit of free enterprise, Fiona. ~ Carl Gallagher

Carl’s on leave from military school for the summer and is bringing discipline and order to the Gallagher fortress, and beaucoup money from the sale of Monica’s meth. He sees no conflict between his military training and his drug dealing, and he thought it was a great idea to buy a new hot tub with some of his meth money. Frank did, too, and said Monica would be proud of Carl. Corporal Carl talked about staying “combat ready” for Hell Week. He can’t wait to torture the 7th graders. Doesn’t it just give you chills to think that Carl is like a serial killer in training at that school?

You’re spending your mom’s dirty meth money on your ex-girlfriend who doesn’t want you anymore. ~ Brad

Lip is working at Brad’s motorcycle shop and trying to stay sober. He runs when he feels edgy. Brad gave him a fidget-spinner for those times when he feels like drinking, and some advice to stay away from Eddie, the girl who mans the cash register. You get the impression that Lip is fooling himself again because Brad is a very serious sponsor. That means he can really help Lip, but Lip ain’t really hearing that.

When he couldn’t get anywhere with Eddie, Lip began eyeing up Sierra again. Brad advised him not to even try to rekindle that relationship for a good 6 months because the breakup was because of his drinking. Lip overheard Sierra bargaining with the electric company so he paid her bill with some of his “Monica money.” He also offered to babysit her son, Lucas, when her babysitter couldn’t make it. Sierra told him that she was going out with Charlie’s father but he still insisted he wanted to hang with Lucas. When Brad learned about this, he correctly surmised that Lip was going to put the moves on Sierra when she got back home. Well, the joke was on him because Sierra brought Charlie back home with her. Wow, that was awkward and Lip took off running to defeat the urge for a cold one. Lip ran to Professor Youens’ home and gave him the rest of his money to pay him back for footing the rehab bill. Youens said he didn’t have to pay him back but Lip said he wants to and thanked him. That, at least, was a foot in a positive direction.

What if I throw in a car? ~ Ian Gallagher

Lip is not the only one trying to go backwards and forward at the same time. Ian wants to get back with Trevor, who was not willing to forgive him for running off with Mickey last season, at least not in this episode. Trevor did waver a little when Ian offered to buy him a used car (the idea of Jamie, one of the shelter kids Trevor helps).

Don’t get stuck in this job, kid. It’ll suck your soul dry. ~ Berta

Debbie is working at a parking garage with difficult customers. She takes Franny with her there. When she goes to welding school, she leaves the baby with her wheelchair-bound fiancé Neil, who you may remember is Sierra’s brother. At welding school, Debbie made cow eyes at Carson, the instructor. Farhad, another student, told her that was never gonna happen and Debbie said “A girl can dream, can’t she?” Debbie told Farhad that she got her share of the Monica money and asked if he could borrow his brother’s truck. So it looks like she has some immediate plans we’ll find out about soon. We don’t think that she intends to stay with Neil, whatever her future plans may be.

We need to do a biopsy immediately ~ Oncologist

Kevin could not resist the two Ben Franklins a strip club customer put in front of him, despite Veronica’s orders not to let anyone touch him. The man turned out to be a cardiologist and when he ran his hands over Kevin’s chest, he felt a lump and referred Kevin to an oncologist. Kevin went right way and learned he has a 4 centimeter mass in his right breast and a biopsy must be done immediately.

Flesh, blood, skin, and bone, drag me down to a river that’s cold. I’d like to apologize, son.

And what of Frank? Well, he’s not getting any Monica money because he smoked his meth while mourning over Monica’s loss. He went home when he was done and announced to Carl that he was going to make amends to all the people he has wronged in the past 3 decades, at least for the things he can remember. He is blaming his dereliction on Monica. He was under “her intoxicating spell.” Frank thinks all he has to do is say he’s sorry for all his horrible deeds and he can pick up where he left off before he and Monica “went down Alice’s famed rabbit hole.” His kids think he might have major brain damage.