Shameless Recap: Boooooooooooone! (Boone)

Did they really name the whole episode (S9 E9) after Tami’s soldier boy Boone just because he and everybody else says his name like some kind of war cry? Yes, they did. But we really didn’t see that much of him and certainly not as much as Tami did.

I’m not entirely sure how it’s not weird for you ~ Lip Gallagher

Boone burst on the scene where Tami and her family and Lip were all getting ready to participate in a 5-K benefit for cancer in honor of Tami’s mother, who died from the disease. Cory, Tami’s little sister, flirted outrageously with Lip and informed him that Boone is Tami’s boyfriend. Both Lip and Tami claimed they were not exclusive but Lip was upset when Tami stayed with Boone, even after he beat Boone in the marathon. Lip wasn’t sure that was something to brag about when Boone was weighed down by a 60-pound duffel and combat boots, but neither was sharing Tami with him. Lip knew he should just break it off with Tami but he did the shameless thing instead and let Cory have her way with him. Then he went over and told Tami that he did it! Playing the “dead soul,” Tami claimed it didn’t bother her at first but admitted it did when Lip got up to leave. They agreed not to see Boone or Cory anymore.

We’re gonna have all six! ~ Ingrid Jones

Because of Ingrid’s age, Dr. Kwan fertilized all of her implanted eggs, only to learn that now there are six viable embryos. Ingrid was overjoyed. Frank was alarmed. Kwan said the most Ingrid can keep all is three or she will lose her license. Ingrid insisted on keeping all six so she and Frank moved back to the Gallagher homestead to hide out from Dr. Kwan who vowed to force Ingrid to go through an embryo reduction. Dr. Kwan’s license is toast anyhow if it ever comes out that Carl is the real father of those embryos.

Yeah, plus, her dad said every gun he owns has a bullet with my name on it ~ Carl Gallagher.

Kelly’s father, Major Keefe, caught Carl on his premises below Kelly’s bedroom and after they had a talk, Carl decided to break it off with Kelly for her own good and to save his own hide as well. At first, he told her she wasn’t hot. Then he said he didn’t want to screw up her chances to go to Annapolis. In the meantime, the two of them had been getting guidance from Ingrid about what they wanted to do with their lives using her “vision board” method.

Carl knew he wanted to overcome the hardships he was born into by “killing for our country.” Kelly did not know what she wanted to do because Major Keefe has made all the decisions about her life, but when she saw her father winning the battle over Carl, she had a sudden epiphany. She marched Carl over to her house and ordered him and her father to sit down. Then she laid down her terms for how she was going to live her life. She wanted to go to Annapolis and she wanted to be with Carl. She wanted to call her father “Dad” and not “Major.” Kelly challenged them to get up and fight her if either of them had a problem with it. They didn’t.

So there you have the characters who were happy for now by the end of the episode.

Sorry about your nose, Rob. I hope it heals crooked ~ Fiona Gallagher

Fiona was even more of a train wreck in this episode than the last. When she woke up in the beginning of the episode, she had Ford Kellogg’s tool box in her bedroom and took out a chisel or something to scratch inside her cast. Then in the middle of a screaming match with Debbie over the utility bills, Ford showed up and wanted his tools back. Fiona claimed she did not have them. Later, Ford came to Patsy’s and even offered her $1,500 for them. Fiona went ballistic and starting throwing plates at him while Eliza did her best to do damage control with the customers. Then when Fiona bumped into a customer, she accused him of touching her butt. Eliza made Fiona sit down and told her when she found her man sleeping with her sister, she took up boxing to get all that destructive hostility out of her system. She invited Fiona to join her but that didn’t go to well either.

The trainer, Rob, told Fiona to take it easy since she got her cast off that very day but “South Side” Fiona broke his nose. Rob asked her if she wanted to buy him a drink later to make up for it and she went off the rails again, ranting that all men are scum. She was of course drinking everywhere she went throughout the episode (even in the shower!) Her next to last stop was Ford’s. She brought along the tools and proceed to hurl them at the windows until she collapsed sobbing on the sidewalk.

That’ll just be an eight-dollar flat fee – for facilities usage. ~ Debbie Gallagher

As we already mentioned, Debbie had turned into the Utility Nazi. The eight-dollar fee was for watching Santiago but Kev managed to wangle a two-dollar discount for immigrant labor because Santiago was “gonna clean your house whether you want him to or not.” 10-year-old Liam did not fare so well. Deb wanted him to pony up $70.00. Due to the Spanish he learned at the Hopkins Academy, Liam was able to communicate with Santiago, who took him in hand and helped him earn money. She set about making the house cost-efficient, “adding insulation to the attic, welding leaking pipes, adding timers to light switches.” And she even changed the locks, refusing to admit anyone who had not paid their full share.

Keep illegals out of the South Side ~ Liam Gallagher

Some workers at a job site let Liam and Santiago help themselves to a load of bricks and they made money by tying Santiago to a fence and charging passersby $1.00 to help build a brick wall in front of him. Kev and Veronica were off to Indiana at the time in search of Jose Gomez, Santiago’s uncle. They found him working at “The Border Wall” where they also ordered two chocolate dipped tacos. Maybe it was him. Who knows? A dozen guys had already claimed to be Santiago’s uncle by then. In any event, this Jose took off running when asked if he was illegal. There were cops in the place and they handcuffed Jose. But when Kev and V engaged the African-American officer in a short exchange about his motives, Jose took off.

Let us not forget that Hobo Loco was introduced in this episode. It’s a ghastly concoction that Bachman Alcohol plans to “crack the Millennial market wide open” with and exploit the “complete lack of perspective” of those “self-proclaimed hobos.” They already had a photo of Frank Gallagher in their “general indigent” sales material and they are running a contest– two actually. One for the bar that can create the best cocktail. The Alibi’s a shoo-in to win that with creative Kev at the helm. He’s already come up with three: the Hoborita, Death and our favorite: the Napalm Gut Rinse. Frank, of course, is a natural to win the $50K contract that goes to the Hobo Loco Man and, so far, he is the only one that actually likes the taste of the stuff.

Supporting Cast of Boone