Blue Bell Boy Quotes

Here are some quotes from Blue Bell Boy, the 4th episode of Boardwalk Empire, Season 3.

Duty calls.

• Katy (Heather Lind)
• Nucky Thompson (Steve Buscemi): Katy, I’m looking for Owen.
• Owen Slater (Charlie Cox): I was just in the loo. I didn’t hear the… (whispers) oh, Jesus…
• Nucky: The two of you?
• Owen? Sir?
• Nucky: Were in the bathroom?
• Owen: I better go, he’s in a bad humor — again.
• Katy: Then it won’t matter if you’re late. Will it, Mr. Poofles?

Boys will be boys

• Al Capone (Stephen Graham): Picking on a kid almost stone cold deaf?
• Mae Capone (Marcella Lentz-Pope) They all are, Al. That’s why he’s there. Boys will be boys whether they can hear each other or not.
• Al Capone: Kid’s gotta toughen up…

Didn’t you try to have me killed, Eli?

• Nucky: If you’ve got a complaint, talk to Mickey.
• Eli Thompson (Shea Whigham): I don’t. It’s just that I’m back now.
• Nucky: I’m well aware of that.

That’s a joke by you?

• Agent Stan Sawicki: Looks like you stepped straight into my trap.
• Nucky: What?
• Sawicki: You know, like I was going to arrest you.
• Nucky: Why would you do that?
• Sawicki: Just making a little joke.
• Owen: Mr. Thompson’s a busy man.
• Nucky: Call me when he (Rowland Smith) gets here/
• Owen: I’ll take care of it. You have my word. You needn’t involve yourself.
• Nucky: Is that what I asked you?
• Owen: You mentioned low profiles. I’m trying to oblige.
• Nucky: (to Sawicki) Go buy a personality.

Smells like bullshit

• Eli: Let me get this straight. Rosetti’s gassing up. Sickles is at the next pump. He completely douses himself with gasoline. Then for some bleeping reason, he decides that it’s a good time for a smoke.
• Deputy Ramsey: Look, what’s the difference?
• Eli: The man was your partner.
• Ramsey: You boys go about your business. Leave these dagos to us.
• Eli: I don’t like this.
• Mickey Doyle (Paul Sparks): Let the man do his job, Eli. You ain’t the only sheriff ever lived. Get in the car.

Smells like sardines

• Al Capone: Would it kill you to pony up for a decent shave once in a while? A little bay rum.
• Jake Guzik (Joe Caniano): It gives me a rash.
• Al Capone: Jake, I’m serious. You know I love ya, huh? But you smell like a sardine’s twat. I mean, what does your wife say?
• Jack Guzik: Why didn’t I marry Milton Korntragger?
• Al Capone: Where you going?
• Jack Guzik: To take a leak. That’s why beer so profitable. We don’t sell it. We only rent it.
• Al Capone: Personal hygiene, Jake. Makes a big impression.

I’m only 15

• Nucky: You know who I am, Rowland? Answer straight.
• Rowland Smith (Nick Robinson): You’re Nucky Thompson. You gave us a Christmas turkey once.
• Nucky: When did I do that?
• Rowland: 1914. When I was 6. Boy, was Ma grateful.
• Nucky: Is this how you thank me?… Stealing my merchandise?
• Rowland: I guess I didn’t think you mind… Anyhow, I didn’t steal it all from you…. A lot of it belongs to Waxey Gordon in Philadelphia.
• Nucky: Did he give your mother a turkey, too?

What’s in your cellar?

• Prohi 1: I’m gonna check the cellar.
• Prohi 2: Anything?
• Prohi 1: Just cobwebs and squirrel turd.
• Owen: Squirrel turds?
• Rowland: That’s rat shit.

Dry gulch time

• Joe Miller; You called Dean O’Bannion a liar at Torrio’s. You got a big mouth to match that big gut.
• Jake Guzik: Enjoy your beer, Joe.
• Joe Miller: How can I with the stink is coming off of you?

What, me worry?

• Eli: I wouldn’t do this, Mickey.
• Mickey Doyle: Of course you wouldn’t. Cause you’re not in charge.
• Eli: Use your head, will ya? There’s no way through the back roads and Tabor Heights is off limits.
• Mickey: The Sheriff’s on it. You heard him yourself.
• Eli: The Sheriff’s been on the job last than a week and the last one got burnt…
• Mickey: (cuts him off) Don’t you have some trucks to load?
• Eli: Sure thing, boss.

Stop annoying single ladies

• Margaret: Women’s Health Clinic. St. Theresa’s Hospital. Free to all. M’am, may I give you one of these?
• Lady with Baby Stroller: Miss. It’s not my baby.

Strictly Business

• Don Joe Masseria (Ivo Nandi): I’ll say this for your Jews: with them, it’s strictly business. Us, our blood runs hot. Because our hearts are big. This is my territory. We know this.
• Lucky Luciano (Vincent Piazza): You get a cut of the card game, a cut of the fence, a cut of the booze…
• Don Joe Masseria: I don’t get a cut of the heroin.

Where’s my hootch?

• Arnold Rothstein (Michael Stuhlberg): Why am I calling you? Why is that even occurring? If I had my liquor on the timely basis your employer promised — If, in fact, I could reach your employer, who now seems to think it’s acceptable business practice to disappear for days on end, this conversation would not be taking place and that would make me very happy…. I want what I paid for. I want it now and I don’t ever want to find myself chatting with you again.
• Mickey Doyle: That Rothstein, warm as a lizard.
• Eli: What’d you tell him.
• Mickey: That it’s coming. Whaddya think?
• Eli: What do I think? That you’re a bleeping idiot.
• Mickey: Watch your step, Eli. I’m your boss.
• Eli: I’m telling you not to do this, Mickey.
• Mickey: I’m not doing nothing. They are.

There are more Blue Bell Boy quotes in these recaps: Nucky’s Costly Detour and the Margaret, Lucky Luciano and Al Capone storylines.