Own Your Stuff: Shameless Recap

In the 5th episode of Shameless Season 7 (10-30-2016), thing were looking up for the New Gallaghers while some of the old Gallaghers had obstacles to deal with, including a broken washing machine that was a highlight of the Cold War between Fiona and Veronica, who continue to be on the outs.

Let’s keep food and illicit substances in our belly ~ Frank Gallagher

Frank learned that his televised stand-off of the bulldozer had paid off when Elena Torres, a community organizer from the Make-a-Nest non-profit, stopped by to inform him that billionaire philanthropist Simon Epstein saw Frank on TV and bought the building for the South Side Homeless. Frank was ecstatic and kept saying he owned the building. He sent everyone out to make money begging. He had his New Gallaghers on hand for the publicity photo that Epstein wanted to take with them. Frank told Epstein how they needed new everythings, TV, appliances, furniture and it was all soon forthcoming. Fiona and Carl were shocked to witness a brand spanking-new washer being delivered to the Gallagher Home for the Homeless after the washing machine that was a gift from Jimmy died.

I’m just a swipe away

We got to see Fiona’s latest Tinder hook-up in this episode. He was a financial planner who told her that owning things was the only way to get rich and gave her his card. Fiona went to see Margo who was unavailable so she talked to Chad about getting a cut of the profits that Patsy’s Pies was now making due to her hard work. He laughed in her face and told her that the owner is the only one who makes real money and Margo is the only owner. Later, Margo showed up at the diner herself and threw Fiona a bone: a $25 a week raise. Fiona started eyeing up the laundry business across the street, where the yuppies were trying to buy the lease of long-time owner, Etta, and evict her from her upstairs apartment.

There’s no crime in fantasy sports and processing credit cards

Lip went back to his internship and had to help get the business back up and running. This gave him access to the company network and big ideas of the variety that Professor Youens had planted in his brain. Lip went back to his former college and enlisted the help of Joaquin in stealing money from the company. How’s that going to work out? They are rolling in so much dough in that company that they budget in the cost of FBI raids, but does it mean they’re not going to notice even a small deficit? We’re just assuming that Lip and Joaquin want to fly under the radar and are not going to try to get away with the heist of the century.

Just watch the middle class pity roll in ~ Frank Gallagher

Debbie sought out Frank’s expertise with ways to make money fast but Frank was unwilling to provide any advice until she offered to change Harry’s name back to Franny (for life– no take-backs). Debbie took to the streets to beg for help. Her baby daddy’s sister-in-law, Tanya, spotted her and was shocked. She asked Debbie if she needed help but Debbie said she was taking care of everything. A homeless woman arrived and demanded that Debbie get out of her spot. Debbie attacked the woman without even taking Franny out of the baby sling and it was all recorded on a passer-by’s cell phone. Tanya also witnessed it. Well, just by the presence of Tanya, you probably figured that it will eventually lead to Derek’s family seeking custody of Franny– even without the physical altercation. The incident was duly reported to the Dept. of Children and Family Services and Debbie is being investigated for child neglect and endangerment. Will Fiona get involved in this mess? Ian and Lip were already complaining to her that she was being too hard on Debbie. Between those two incidents, Debbie ran into Neil, or we should say that Neil ran into Debbie (literally, with his wheelchair). Neil is Sierra’s brain-damaged brother who was in an accident and says whatever he’s thinking. Evidently, he is always thinking about tatas and bootys. Once she found out that Neil got a big settlement, Debbie hatched a scheme to become his caretaker.

Black Irish doesn’t count

Carl applied to military school but was put on a waiting list for the following year because they only had spots left for minorities. Carl’s claim that he was part black was rejected. Sgt. Winslow refused to vouch for that but relented to the extent that he took Carl for a DNA swab to determine his ancestry. The lab was having a buy-one-get-one free special. Sgt. Winslow wasn’t interested until the lab worker told him that he had learned he was a descendant of the Fulani tribe and changed his name to Chuku. Carl proved to be 33.5 percent Apache Indian and Sgt. Winslow, much to his dismay, had 22% Irish ancestry traceable to the Puritans.

Ian was in denial that his relationship with Trevor was just friendship, despite his co-worker Sue pointing out that he was fooling himself, that there was no such thing as a platonic relationship. Everyone is either having sex or waiting to have it. After a night of partying and necking, Trevor stopped by and invited Ian to his place. Ian was so confused that he tried to have an “adult convo” about it with Kev, who was more confused over that than he was about which of his kids got vaccinated with what.

Veronica and Svetlana, you see, made plans to adopt each other’s kids, something that Kev was initially opposed to but he came around. They had to have the children vaccinated which they all seemed to know absolutely nothing about. Svetlana claimed that Russian children are put out in the cold for a nap and that immunizes them. None of these people have ever had a vaccination? Whatever, they decided to experiment by having one child completely vaccinated and the other two only partially so. None of them kept track of which kid got what vaccination.

Guest Stars and Co-Stars in Own Your Sh*t